Jesus, meet PSU! . . . PSU, meet Jesus?

I have had two weeks of class so far, and I am getting acquainted with Portland State University and the culture of Portland more and more.

In my classes I hear all sorts of interpretations of what "love" and "peace" and "mercy" are from my classmates and professors. Everything seems so relative and aimless and empty without its grounding in Jesus. He is so beautiful and lovely. In the midst of studying peace and reconciliation I am constantly reminded that it is he who provides the ability for love, peace, forgiveness, and mercy. How do we forgive others? How? The act of forgiveness is often painfully difficult. I suppose I am at PSU to hear how people forgive when the do not know Jesus. I don't think that I would forgive anyone if I didn't have a profound example of forgiveness in my life, and even then, I would need th capacity. Jesus provides both for me. The way and the light.

My professor was grasping in the air trying to explain what "mercy" was by definition, and I wanted to whisper "jesus." And my classmates were trying to discuss the meaning of justice, and I so desperetely wanted to say "God!" He is wonderfully just.

I am in a whole new context and culture here in Portland and in my university. It is like nothing I have ever experienced. It is wonderous. It keeps me ever fascinated and contemplating.

It is a culture that finds Christianity abrasive. In many ways, I don't blame them. Some of the people who call themselves Christians seem abrasive to me. Amidst this culture that is a melting pot for spirituality, I am finding ways of being invitational and helpful at helping people to get past their stereotypes, but it is a whole new world here, and I'm taking my time learning what is and is not helpful to say and do right away. The things they want and desire are actually what Jesus offers them, but they do not know that it is offered. And I sit beside them, and pray and talk to Jesus and ask Him to introduce Himself to them.

There is a real hostility toward Christianity here, but people generally appreciate Jesus. They are curious about Him. They want to use His example. I am not spending nearly enough time with Him that I might look like him. Here's a strange thought I have been having: I'm realizing that I perhaps need to spend more time with Jesus than I do with the Church, that I might look more like Him. I need the Church. The Church is my family. However, I have realized that it's fairly easy for me to look like the Church, but not as natural or easy to look like Jesus. I'm a follower or Jesus. I need the Church, but sometimes I get confused about what it means to follow Jesus as I am immersed in it. does that make sense?

...just some thoughts I've been having...

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Europe was.

A link to a short and amazing video:
http://www.dom268.com/movies/cai.mov

do this in memory of me.

About a week ago I was traveling and I visited a church with a friend. It was communion sunday, and after the band led the congregation in a few songs, a man came up on the "stage" and said a few words about what communion meant to him. He used the analogy of a Thanksgiving dinner where family all come and gather around the table because they love each other and they are celebrating. I thought that this analogy was a great image to paint especially considering the season and the general feelings of unity and community that the image of Thanksgiving dinner brings to mind for most Americans. After this really nice explanation, he let the congregation know that communion was to be received at the various stations around the church.

The band continued to play as people got up one-by-one to walk to the back of the church. I didn't even notice that it was time to receive communion until my friend got up. I followed her and got in line. Something just didn't seem right though. In fact, many things didn't seems right. I watched as people came away from the table. They were carrying what looked like little shot glasses of grape juice and pellets of bread. I've gone to church most of my life, but I had new eyes to see this particular Sunday that the celebration of communion in today's churches is lacking. How could is the Church of today reflecting the community of faith I read about in the Bible?

The first celebration of communion was Jesus' breaking of bread and sharing wine with his disciples on the night that he was betrayed. When I read the passage of the Bible in the book of Luke where Jesus and the disciples celebrate the Passover meal, it seems to me shockingly different than the way we today, as the Church, celebrate communion. We have reduced it to an impersonal, sterile, individualized ritual that poorly reflects the meal it is designed to remind us of. Jesus washed the disciples feet (humbled himself before them and invited them into a deeper friendship with him). Jesus assured Peter, "Unless I wash you, Peter, you can have no part in me." The meal that they shared served as a symbol and a milestone for what was to come. The celebration at the Last Supper vividly showed the humble servant that Jesus was - so much so that it made Peter uncomfortable. It was an interpersonal celebration. It was a communal celebration.

Halfway down the isle, I turned and walked back to my seat. I just couldn't do it. Tears flooding out of my eyes, I sat back down and prayed. For that church. For the Church. In repentance for how I have allowed myself to celebrate communion while not knowing my brothers and sisters around me. How communion for me has become more about me and Jesus and less about washing the feet of those around me. I repent of how I so easily forget the humble, interpersonal savior that I share with the Church around me and how I often don't make room in my life to celebrate with them what he has done for us.