My Work: These Numbers Have Faces

What's new with me?
Well, one of the most significant changes in my life has been joining the team of people who work for a non-profit called These Numbers Have Faces.



Why am I so excited?
There are several reasons:
1. We work in post-apartheid South Africa. I am learning a lot about South Africa as I'm pursuing a Masters in Conflict Resolution and Peace Studies. I have a great admiration for all that the Rainbow Nation has overcome, AND I recognize that the country has a long way to go before blacks in South Africa are truly free.
2. I'm passionate about social change in post-conflict areas. There is a lot of "cleaning up" to do after a society has been ravaged with violent conflict. In the case of South Africa, nearly ninety percent of the resources are still in the hands of about ten percent of the people. This means that the resources available for black South Africans are not always adequate for them to meet their basic needs. Resources are even more lacking for those with the ambition to earn a college degree.
3. TNHF is based on individual relationships and partnerships. The idea is that we are friends with the people with whom we partner. We work on small-scale projects. Our work is deep rather than broad. Our partnership works to provide a small group of youth in the township of Gugulethu with AIDS education, mentoring, character development, sports training, and educational resources. We know these kids.
4. Even though TNHF has only been established for a little over a year, a lot of great things are happening! TNHF's partnership in South Africa is with a high school-age soccer team called JL Zwane Football Club. The team has had a great season, and they are being cared for and mentored by Coach Eric. The MOST exciting part for me has been that our first student, Anda Sozawe, has graduated from high school, gotten accepted into college, and is now in his first term at Northlink College in South Africa. Anda is studying Sports Management at Northlink and hopes to return to his home community of Gugulethu better equipped to mentor other future leaders through soccer.

This photo was taken of Anda while he was practicing.

5. I'm going to South Africa this summer! Yeah, that's right. I'm going to Capetown this summer with TNHF. We will check in with JL Zwane FC and Coach Eric to reassess what comes next. I might explore some opportunities to bring young South African women into TNHF. :)

I just started working with TNHF, but I'd appreciate your prayers and encouragement for what lies ahead for me and for us. Check out the website. It might get you excited too!

its ok to be extraordinary...in fact, it is worship

I have a bad habit. Well, the truth is that I probably have a lot of bad habits. One that I have become aware of lately is that I think that I have a fear of being extraordinary. What I mean is that there are times that I realize that God has made me very special and wonderful and he is changing and growing my heart in beautiful ways. The unfortunate thing is that often I want to downplay the ways in which God is doing a great thing in me. SI mislabel it 'humility'. I don't want to seem too extraordinary to others and when I am blown away by the good work God is doing in my inner being, I shy away from celebrating it.

I spent this past weekend gathering with a group of women who have quickly become some of my heroes. We gathered together because we all share a relationship with Jesus and a desire to come alongside others in our faith communities to lead them in the way of Jesus...whatever that means in each of our contexts. I found that it looks profoundly different from woman to woman and from community to community. The retreat/conference was called Convergence. It was encouraging.

The women who surrounded me at Convergence were extraordinary. There is something indescribably alluring about women who celebrate the ways in which God's image is manifested in them. I found that although the women who attended represented a wide spectrum of backgrounds, appearances, and interests, so many of them had a sort of glow that comes from being yourself and being treasured for it.

Let me just say that I am thankful and proud to be a woman!

I found myself feeling treasured. I felt an appreciation for being me. And I realized that I am extraordinary, in my own way. And acknowledging that I am extraordinary does not mean that I'm not humble. Rather, the acknowledgment is celebration of how extraordinary God's love is. He chooses to take silly and ordinary people like me. And he does things. Within us. And that makes us extraordinary.

I turn twenty-four tomorrow. I'm ready. I want to begin living my life in a way that celebrates how wonderful it is to be myself. When I downplay the beautiful things that God is doing in me, I am taking away from an opportunity to worship him.

This is my hope: Twenty-four will be about thanking God for how he has made me, trusting that he made me the way I am for specific reasons and that I will be able to love others in unique ways as a result. I think that the twenty-four year-old Dominique will be courageously obedient to the person she is becoming, despite how much she might want to blend in with others.

I'm ready to be extraordinarily and courageously true to the person God has made me. May God be glorified.

There is beauty in this: responding to disappointment with humitily and grace

I forgot my best friend, Kate's, birthday last week. Have you ever done that? It feels awful. In this case, however, there were some surprises and delights.

I had been in the middle of a very stressful conflict with someone else in my life. In need of her support and honest criticism, I called my dear friend, Kate, several times during the week. We had some conversations that were deeply beneficial to me in understanding how to respond to this particular person in a gracious and appropriate way. On Friday (my friend's birthday) I was driving alone through rush hour traffic, felt overwhelmed with the conflict, and knew that I needed a friend in that moment. I called Kate and we talked for a few minutes, but she was running out the door. The next day, when I called to finish our conversation, I asked her what she had done the night before. "Some people took me out for ice cream because yesterday was my birthday."

It felt like my breath had been knocked out of my chest. I had no words.

I hope that I never forget how she responded. What a woman she is! [Gentlemen, she's single!]

She told me that it did not matter that I had not remembered her birthday. I, of course, thought she was full of it, and protested. But, she said, the greatest present a friend can receive is to know that she is truly considered a friend. When I was in need, when I needed someone whom I could trust and whom I knew truly cared for me and knew me, it was her. And besides, she said, she had practically forgotten my birthdays for the past 2 years (I know...it's something we will both try to work on).

What struck me about this was what she did not say, and how well I knew that she meant what she did say. In the context of our relationship, her birthday was about my needs on that day. Birthdays are a huge deal in my family, and I was, in a way, brought up to expect them to be all about me. I am still trying to detox myself from extravagant birthday expectations now that I am in my twenties. I think Kate grew up much the same way. Still, we have an unstated understanding that were the situation reversed, I would gladly spend my birthday on the phone with her if she needed me.

The sacrifice and selflessness required of a deep and true friendship is a beautiful thing. What a beautiful friend I have! and what a beautiful friendship we share that she can confidently know that I love her based on all the ways we care for one another every other day of the year.

I hope to remember the humility and selflessness with which Kate saw this situation. There will be future disappointments of this kind in my life and I want to reflect the kind of godliness and beauty that Kate does when my turn comes up. I tend to have HUGE expectations for just about everything and then I get disappointed. I think that how we deal with disappointment tells a lot about our character. It's easy to act like a big baby when we are disappointed. When we are disappointed, I think it is necessary to back up and examine the broader picture of what is going on. Kate knew that last friday was not only her birthday, but that it was a tough day for me. I'm thankful that I have good examples of what it means to respond to disappointment with character and perspective. Now I don't really have an excuse for acting like a baby when I'm disappointed. :) Thanks Kate! haha.